Everyone talks about how hard it is to raise kids today.
That is true, it is very hard to raise children that are respectful and honest, but it isn't any harder today than it was when our parents were on the job.
Believe me when I tell you I was no angel, and I am sure we can all swap stories for hours.
When your mother said "I hope you have kids one day", she really meant it, or at least mine did.
Today it is not harder, it is just different.
With the breakdown in families everyone has become a busy parent and the term "troubled teen" is common.
Before, that term was whispered between neighbors to talk about the bad kid down the street.
Today it's a keyword search phrase.
Some parents feel that if they can get their child to adulthood without any permanent damage (felony record or pregnancy) they have succeeded.
Busy parents or not, I think the goal is set a little low if you call that success.
The best defense is always a good offense and a good offense takes time to build.
I need to cover two specific side topics before we move on: 1.
If you are picking your son up from jail for the second or third time then you will need to take some stronger action.
That is not covered here.
2.
Do you remember those old public service commercials "This is your brain on drugs"? The one that applies here is "Kids that do drugs have parents that do drugs".
If your children are in trouble and emulating you, this will not help either.
The time to start is early, normally before the age of 5.
Actually you should start at birth.
They say that children don't have much more than "spotty" memories before the age of 5 and I fall in that category, I have 5 or 6 only.
The thing is parenting is a daily event, age four leads to five and then to six and so on.
Children develop and change and their interests change almost daily.
But what is their passion? What is the one them that really gets them and keeps them coming back? What is the one thing they always return to? If you can identify this at an early age then you can, not push, but make available activities and events that interest your child and attract them to it.
If your son likes dolphins, set him up with some National Geographic program that will enhance his interest (Marine Biology maybe).
If your daughter draws or paints, get her into some kind of art class related to the art she does.
Age does not matter, the younger the better.
If your children have goals and dreams that are stronger than peer pressure then they will stick to their goals.
Peer pressure is the problem you face when they start to hit their teens.
You need to position your children so that their primary peer pressure comes from the people associated with their passion and not the new kid down the street that has a parent where "no felony, no pregnancy" is success.
That is true, it is very hard to raise children that are respectful and honest, but it isn't any harder today than it was when our parents were on the job.
Believe me when I tell you I was no angel, and I am sure we can all swap stories for hours.
When your mother said "I hope you have kids one day", she really meant it, or at least mine did.
Today it is not harder, it is just different.
With the breakdown in families everyone has become a busy parent and the term "troubled teen" is common.
Before, that term was whispered between neighbors to talk about the bad kid down the street.
Today it's a keyword search phrase.
Some parents feel that if they can get their child to adulthood without any permanent damage (felony record or pregnancy) they have succeeded.
Busy parents or not, I think the goal is set a little low if you call that success.
The best defense is always a good offense and a good offense takes time to build.
I need to cover two specific side topics before we move on: 1.
If you are picking your son up from jail for the second or third time then you will need to take some stronger action.
That is not covered here.
2.
Do you remember those old public service commercials "This is your brain on drugs"? The one that applies here is "Kids that do drugs have parents that do drugs".
If your children are in trouble and emulating you, this will not help either.
The time to start is early, normally before the age of 5.
Actually you should start at birth.
They say that children don't have much more than "spotty" memories before the age of 5 and I fall in that category, I have 5 or 6 only.
The thing is parenting is a daily event, age four leads to five and then to six and so on.
Children develop and change and their interests change almost daily.
But what is their passion? What is the one them that really gets them and keeps them coming back? What is the one thing they always return to? If you can identify this at an early age then you can, not push, but make available activities and events that interest your child and attract them to it.
If your son likes dolphins, set him up with some National Geographic program that will enhance his interest (Marine Biology maybe).
If your daughter draws or paints, get her into some kind of art class related to the art she does.
Age does not matter, the younger the better.
If your children have goals and dreams that are stronger than peer pressure then they will stick to their goals.
Peer pressure is the problem you face when they start to hit their teens.
You need to position your children so that their primary peer pressure comes from the people associated with their passion and not the new kid down the street that has a parent where "no felony, no pregnancy" is success.