Besides the mental and physical thrills inherent in new relationships, one of the biggest draws about new relationships is that you get caught up in the activity of getting to know the other person.
You learn all about their habits, their likes and dislikes.
For awhile all your mental energy pours into cramming to find out everything you can glean from them.
It's like landing the perfect job, the one better than you ever dreamed it could be.
Until, well you know, the thrill wears off but you still like going to work everyday, or else it's a job you hate and you have to quit.
Or sadly, you get fired.
I talked to one of my friends about how she handles break ups and here's what she said: "I had lots of stupid relationships, got heart-broken twice and even three times repeatedly by the same men.
I dated all of my exes again, and all failed multiple times.
Over and over.
I guess that helped me not to fear much, and gave me a thick skin.
X sometimes complains I am too practical and not much emotional.
After all my breakups, I pledged to learn something new.
A yarn craft, a new skill.
I am one of the most proficient yarn handlers I have ever met.
I beat the oldest women in the family, as I do several styles of crochet, knitting, tatting, embroidery, cross-stitch and I sew by hand.
I made dresses and skirts for my daughter by hand.
Men were not useless afterall...
they made me learn a lot.
" I think she's got a good point.
And one that hadn't occurred to me.
Whenever I'm single I try new hobbies but never made the connection.
I've done stained glass, mosiacs, canning, more baking than anyone should be allowed...
When breakups happen, even the ones that end in solid friendships which most of mine thankfully have, you still lose a piece of yourself.
You gain something, learning new traits about the other person and yourself, but you lose something too.
A part of you is left irretrievably behind.
Hobbies don't have that painful side effect.
Nor do pets, and that just reinforces my current Rebound Mechanism-to get a dog.
You get the benefit and mental fulfillment of learning all about someone new, their habits, their likes and dislikes without ever losing yourself.
And that unconditional love thing they offer? Priceless.
You learn all about their habits, their likes and dislikes.
For awhile all your mental energy pours into cramming to find out everything you can glean from them.
It's like landing the perfect job, the one better than you ever dreamed it could be.
Until, well you know, the thrill wears off but you still like going to work everyday, or else it's a job you hate and you have to quit.
Or sadly, you get fired.
I talked to one of my friends about how she handles break ups and here's what she said: "I had lots of stupid relationships, got heart-broken twice and even three times repeatedly by the same men.
I dated all of my exes again, and all failed multiple times.
Over and over.
I guess that helped me not to fear much, and gave me a thick skin.
X sometimes complains I am too practical and not much emotional.
After all my breakups, I pledged to learn something new.
A yarn craft, a new skill.
I am one of the most proficient yarn handlers I have ever met.
I beat the oldest women in the family, as I do several styles of crochet, knitting, tatting, embroidery, cross-stitch and I sew by hand.
I made dresses and skirts for my daughter by hand.
Men were not useless afterall...
they made me learn a lot.
" I think she's got a good point.
And one that hadn't occurred to me.
Whenever I'm single I try new hobbies but never made the connection.
I've done stained glass, mosiacs, canning, more baking than anyone should be allowed...
When breakups happen, even the ones that end in solid friendships which most of mine thankfully have, you still lose a piece of yourself.
You gain something, learning new traits about the other person and yourself, but you lose something too.
A part of you is left irretrievably behind.
Hobbies don't have that painful side effect.
Nor do pets, and that just reinforces my current Rebound Mechanism-to get a dog.
You get the benefit and mental fulfillment of learning all about someone new, their habits, their likes and dislikes without ever losing yourself.
And that unconditional love thing they offer? Priceless.