We spent most of our twenties through forties building a life for ourselves and family.
We raised our children, took care of our spouse and home, pursued a career of our own or, decided to stay home and tackle the daily tasks awaiting us.
Then, one day, we realize that our kids have grown up and are ready to go out into the world on their own.
A great part of our self-identity seems to "crumble" and we find ourselves wondering: Now, what? It is not easy to make the transition from parenting and family person to just being by yourself or, if you've been "lucky", just you and your spouse again.
It is time to redefine yourself and your life, isn't it? Hence, you get ready to start a new chapter and re-learn to focus on you rather than "them" and then you.
If you have a partner, both of you face the same challenge: rekindling your relationship as a couple and redefining the course of the rest of your lives.
If you are alone, it becomes a bit more challenging.
Arriving to an empty home is another reminder that you have started a new chapter in your life.
Starting this new phase in your life's journey is not an easy task as some celebrities and others might make it seem to be.
It's like shedding your skin.
For at least 18 years, you've worn your family person skin.
You were the provider, organizer, counselor, leader, and so on of the children you raised.
If your partner or spouse is no longer in the picture and the children are living their own lives as young adults, getting home after work to an empty place can bring about, eventually, feelings of loneliness and loss.
How do you cope? One way of coping is giving yourself a chance to re-acquaint with that part of your identity that was pushed aside or neglected in favor of others in your life for so many years.
Sit down and make a list of all the things you've always wanted to do and postpone (like learning something new, traveling, writing, gardening, etc) and give yourself some estimated deadlines to begin accomplishing these new goals one day at a time.
Another way of coping is bringing new life into your home in the form of pets.
Many people tend to adopt a pet when they find themselves alone again.
It is amazing how pets do enrich our existence and provide us with a new purpose.
They are loyal and affectionate companions who depend on us to remain alive.
Thus, they extend our family.
However, one must be careful not become an animal hoarder (which is very easy to do) and again begin postponing one's needs and wants for their sake.
They are there to help you enjoy your life better and give you new responsibilities and joys, not to enslave you! This is your time.
It is a chance to continue living your life to your fullest and under your own terms.
Thus, redefining yourself is mostly an exercise in introspection and setting new achievable goals for yourself.
Become your own best friend, increase your participation in your community, volunteer, take up a cause that sparks your passion, etc.
Whatever your goals are, whatever you choose to do, just make sure is something you are passionate about and fulfills you.
Life is a journey that takes us in different directions as we move on.
Tracing a new course is mostly up to us and the outcome usually depends on the choices we make.
You have the power to make every phase of your life a new adventure in living and being human.
We raised our children, took care of our spouse and home, pursued a career of our own or, decided to stay home and tackle the daily tasks awaiting us.
Then, one day, we realize that our kids have grown up and are ready to go out into the world on their own.
A great part of our self-identity seems to "crumble" and we find ourselves wondering: Now, what? It is not easy to make the transition from parenting and family person to just being by yourself or, if you've been "lucky", just you and your spouse again.
It is time to redefine yourself and your life, isn't it? Hence, you get ready to start a new chapter and re-learn to focus on you rather than "them" and then you.
If you have a partner, both of you face the same challenge: rekindling your relationship as a couple and redefining the course of the rest of your lives.
If you are alone, it becomes a bit more challenging.
Arriving to an empty home is another reminder that you have started a new chapter in your life.
Starting this new phase in your life's journey is not an easy task as some celebrities and others might make it seem to be.
It's like shedding your skin.
For at least 18 years, you've worn your family person skin.
You were the provider, organizer, counselor, leader, and so on of the children you raised.
If your partner or spouse is no longer in the picture and the children are living their own lives as young adults, getting home after work to an empty place can bring about, eventually, feelings of loneliness and loss.
How do you cope? One way of coping is giving yourself a chance to re-acquaint with that part of your identity that was pushed aside or neglected in favor of others in your life for so many years.
Sit down and make a list of all the things you've always wanted to do and postpone (like learning something new, traveling, writing, gardening, etc) and give yourself some estimated deadlines to begin accomplishing these new goals one day at a time.
Another way of coping is bringing new life into your home in the form of pets.
Many people tend to adopt a pet when they find themselves alone again.
It is amazing how pets do enrich our existence and provide us with a new purpose.
They are loyal and affectionate companions who depend on us to remain alive.
Thus, they extend our family.
However, one must be careful not become an animal hoarder (which is very easy to do) and again begin postponing one's needs and wants for their sake.
They are there to help you enjoy your life better and give you new responsibilities and joys, not to enslave you! This is your time.
It is a chance to continue living your life to your fullest and under your own terms.
Thus, redefining yourself is mostly an exercise in introspection and setting new achievable goals for yourself.
Become your own best friend, increase your participation in your community, volunteer, take up a cause that sparks your passion, etc.
Whatever your goals are, whatever you choose to do, just make sure is something you are passionate about and fulfills you.
Life is a journey that takes us in different directions as we move on.
Tracing a new course is mostly up to us and the outcome usually depends on the choices we make.
You have the power to make every phase of your life a new adventure in living and being human.