Here's the situation- you have recently met a new woman, you've been on a date or two, or maybe this is the first date, and you come across a crossroads decision.
Should you demonstrate some assertiveness and try to be more aggressive or should you play the part of the perfect gentleman and swoon her that way? What does she expect from you? What's a guy to do? These are all valid questions since there is no absolute right or wrong in the dating game.
If you are too aggressive, you might scare her by being perceived as too pushy or only after one thing; if you are too much of a gentleman, you risk having her see you in more of the role of a provider, rather than a lover.
Either way you can go wrong and sometimes it's impossible to know what the right balance is.
In situations like these, where you might just strike out either way, the default mode should always be to lean toward being overly aggressive, rather than not aggressive enough.
Of course, you need to keep yourself in check and absolutely make sure you don't violate the woman's space and personal parameters.
Why is this the best course of action when in doubt? Women love male aggression, the truth is that they are sexually aroused by it.
Key word here is aggression, not violence.
This is why athletes, powerful execs and men in uniform are all sexually appealing to many women- these are men who display aggression in their daily lives.
Being assertive and aggressive is a key male attribute; it is a function of the male hormone, testosterone.
Women are attracted to what they are not.
In essence, they are attracted to masculinity.
Playing the gentleman role is all well and good, but you risk the serious danger of being perceived as someone who is overly kowtowing to her every wants and needs, or someone who is unsure or hesitant, or even as someone who is meek and somewhat feminine.
These are all things you definitely do not want to be perceived as.
So here's the advice in a nutshell: If you are in a situation where you can either choose to voice your opinion or hold back, ALWAYS voice your opinion.
If you are in a situation where you can reach in for the kiss or not, ALWAYS go in for the kiss.
If you are in a situation where you can lead the date or ask her what she wants to do, ALWAYS lead and have her follow.
If you are in a situation where you can lead her by the hand or have her lead you by the hand, ALWAYS do the leading.
If you are in a situation where you can either not care what she or anyone else thinks or ask her for her opinion, ALWAYS act as if you are unconcerned with the way you are perceived.
If she makes a favorable comment about you and you can either act unfazed or act as if she just made your day, ALWAYS act the least concerned.
If she makes a negative comment about you and you can either act unfazed or act hurt and defensive, ALWAYS act the least concerned.
If you are in a situation where she tests you and you can either react or not, ALWAYS act the least concerned.
If you are in a situation where you can either act like a rough, uncouth caveman or act like a polished, smooth Ken Doll, ALWAYS GO CAVEMAN.
Remember, when in doubt, go caveman, young man.
Should you demonstrate some assertiveness and try to be more aggressive or should you play the part of the perfect gentleman and swoon her that way? What does she expect from you? What's a guy to do? These are all valid questions since there is no absolute right or wrong in the dating game.
If you are too aggressive, you might scare her by being perceived as too pushy or only after one thing; if you are too much of a gentleman, you risk having her see you in more of the role of a provider, rather than a lover.
Either way you can go wrong and sometimes it's impossible to know what the right balance is.
In situations like these, where you might just strike out either way, the default mode should always be to lean toward being overly aggressive, rather than not aggressive enough.
Of course, you need to keep yourself in check and absolutely make sure you don't violate the woman's space and personal parameters.
Why is this the best course of action when in doubt? Women love male aggression, the truth is that they are sexually aroused by it.
Key word here is aggression, not violence.
This is why athletes, powerful execs and men in uniform are all sexually appealing to many women- these are men who display aggression in their daily lives.
Being assertive and aggressive is a key male attribute; it is a function of the male hormone, testosterone.
Women are attracted to what they are not.
In essence, they are attracted to masculinity.
Playing the gentleman role is all well and good, but you risk the serious danger of being perceived as someone who is overly kowtowing to her every wants and needs, or someone who is unsure or hesitant, or even as someone who is meek and somewhat feminine.
These are all things you definitely do not want to be perceived as.
So here's the advice in a nutshell: If you are in a situation where you can either choose to voice your opinion or hold back, ALWAYS voice your opinion.
If you are in a situation where you can reach in for the kiss or not, ALWAYS go in for the kiss.
If you are in a situation where you can lead the date or ask her what she wants to do, ALWAYS lead and have her follow.
If you are in a situation where you can lead her by the hand or have her lead you by the hand, ALWAYS do the leading.
If you are in a situation where you can either not care what she or anyone else thinks or ask her for her opinion, ALWAYS act as if you are unconcerned with the way you are perceived.
If she makes a favorable comment about you and you can either act unfazed or act as if she just made your day, ALWAYS act the least concerned.
If she makes a negative comment about you and you can either act unfazed or act hurt and defensive, ALWAYS act the least concerned.
If you are in a situation where she tests you and you can either react or not, ALWAYS act the least concerned.
If you are in a situation where you can either act like a rough, uncouth caveman or act like a polished, smooth Ken Doll, ALWAYS GO CAVEMAN.
Remember, when in doubt, go caveman, young man.