Love At A Distance: Ten Keys To A Great Long Distance Relationship
These days, it's ridiculously easy to fall in love with someone on the other side of the world.
The Internet allows people with common interests to make contact and this often leads to friendships developing and even relationships blossoming.
But a long distance relationship -- particularly an international one -- is a lot harder than maintaining a relationship where you see your partner regularly.
This article gives you ten tips on making your long distance relationship much more enjoyable and fulfilling.
Treat It Like A Normal Relationship People form emotional attachments in a long distance relationship just like they do in a face-to-face one.
Pretending that your long distance relationship is somehow different is going to cause both you and your partner a lot of pain.
You shouldn't go around flirting -- or cheating -- with other people and you should consider yourself off the market, just as you would if you were dating someone local.
It's a good way to prove to your partner that you're serious about the relationship and that you're not just playing games with their emotions.
After all, they're probably taking it seriously and hoping it will go somewhere in the long term.
Work On Developing Trust Trust is even more vital to a long distance relationship than it is to a face-to-face one.
If you're going to make it long term, you need to be able to relax about what your partner is thinking andbelieve they're as committed to the relationship as you are.
If you don't and you start giving in to your fears, then you'll tie yourself in knots in no time.
If they have an online presence, make sure that you give them plenty of space and don't track down every single word they say online.
Doing so is a surefire way to show that you don't trust your partner and it's going to cause you all sorts of problems in the longer term.
Stay In Touch Communication with your partner is easier today than it was even five years ago.
Apart from emails, there's chat rooms, instant messaging and webcams.
Another great option are Voice over Internet Protocol (VoIP) programs, like Skype or GoogleTalk.
They're just like a telephone call, with the bonus that they're completely free between registered users, no matter where you are in the world.
There's no time limits on calls either, so it's possible to spend literally hours chatting with your partner.
If you want to do something even more interactive, you can both play massively multi-player online games together, such as World of Warcraft or Second Life.
Develop Common Interests Common interests are a great way to keep your conversations going.
Given the distance, it's vital build a solid friendship as a foundation for your relationship.
If you both have some hobbies in common, it gives you plenty of things to discuss.
You can even share tips and suggestions on how to make things better.
It also gives you both something good to talk about other than how frustrating it is that you're both apart and can't be with each other in person.
Surprise Each Other Surprising your partner with a gift or a thoughtful gesture is a great way of showing that you care.
It doesn't have to be anything fancy; it might just be as simple as a photo of you with some thoughts about how you feel about them.
You might go to the trouble of buying or even hand making something for them and sending it to them through the post.
Getting a parcel in the mail is always exciting, and it's especially touching when it contains a thoughtful gift.
If you can't make something, then ordering something online from places like Amazon.
com or a florist close to where your partner lives can work just as well.
Get Raunchy Occasionally Imagination is one of the biggest turn-ons for a lot of people, so why not use it to your advantage and dream up little fantasies to share with your partner while your online? While it can be a bit embarrassing to start with, all you need to do is imagine what you'd like to be doing with your partner and just describe that to them.
You don't even need to be overly graphic with you're descriptions; leaving them some blanks to fill in with their own imaginations can often be an even bigger turn on for them.
If you're embarrassed, it might be easier to start with a text-only format like email or instant messaging, but once you get more adventurous, you can try it while talking online or while using webcams.
Don't Make It All About Sex While online sex can be a lot of fun, you need to be careful that your relationship doesn't revolve around it.
If it's all you're after, then there's a good chance that things are going to peter out pretty quickly.
Netsex isn't as good as the real thing and can be incredibly frustrating if you don't have a physical outlet.
So, remember it's better to have a sense of moderation and try to balance your time with your partner talking about other things.
There's no need to avoid it completely, but like a normal face-to-face relationship, too much of an emphasis on sex can cause the relationship to quickly fall apart.
Be Realistic Long distance relationships can be very tough if you have unrealistic expectations about where things are going.
Talk about these things and realize that getting together in person is going to require a lot of sacrifice for one or both of you.
Weigh up if that's a price you're both willing to pay.
If you're serious about your relationship, then you'll find being open and honest will actually make the load easier to bear for both of you.
Make Plans To Get Together Definitely plan to get together in person as often as you can, even if you can't move to be with one another.
Plans like these give you both something to look forward to and can help ward off the frustration that long distance relationships often cause.
If you're in the same country, it's often easier to make these plans than it is if you and your partner live on opposite sides of the planet.
The ultimate aim of any long distance relationship should be moving together somewhere, so try to factor that into any plans that you're making.
It's a good idea to spend a few weeks on a couple of separate occasions to make sure you're compatible before taking the plunge and moving closer together permanently.
Don't Give Up Your Own Life Just because you're in an online relationship with someone doesn't mean that you need to spend every waking moment glued to your computer.
You still have a life of your own to live and you need to spend time away from the net.
If nothing else, it will give you things to talk about when you are spending time with your partner.
Sweating off on when they're going to come online or whether or not they've send you an email or an instant message will drive you insane.
If you keep things in perspective, it's much easier to have a fulfilling life and still be able to spend quality time with your partner, without becoming obsessive and stalkerish about it.
The Internet allows people with common interests to make contact and this often leads to friendships developing and even relationships blossoming.
But a long distance relationship -- particularly an international one -- is a lot harder than maintaining a relationship where you see your partner regularly.
This article gives you ten tips on making your long distance relationship much more enjoyable and fulfilling.
Treat It Like A Normal Relationship People form emotional attachments in a long distance relationship just like they do in a face-to-face one.
Pretending that your long distance relationship is somehow different is going to cause both you and your partner a lot of pain.
You shouldn't go around flirting -- or cheating -- with other people and you should consider yourself off the market, just as you would if you were dating someone local.
It's a good way to prove to your partner that you're serious about the relationship and that you're not just playing games with their emotions.
After all, they're probably taking it seriously and hoping it will go somewhere in the long term.
Work On Developing Trust Trust is even more vital to a long distance relationship than it is to a face-to-face one.
If you're going to make it long term, you need to be able to relax about what your partner is thinking andbelieve they're as committed to the relationship as you are.
If you don't and you start giving in to your fears, then you'll tie yourself in knots in no time.
If they have an online presence, make sure that you give them plenty of space and don't track down every single word they say online.
Doing so is a surefire way to show that you don't trust your partner and it's going to cause you all sorts of problems in the longer term.
Stay In Touch Communication with your partner is easier today than it was even five years ago.
Apart from emails, there's chat rooms, instant messaging and webcams.
Another great option are Voice over Internet Protocol (VoIP) programs, like Skype or GoogleTalk.
They're just like a telephone call, with the bonus that they're completely free between registered users, no matter where you are in the world.
There's no time limits on calls either, so it's possible to spend literally hours chatting with your partner.
If you want to do something even more interactive, you can both play massively multi-player online games together, such as World of Warcraft or Second Life.
Develop Common Interests Common interests are a great way to keep your conversations going.
Given the distance, it's vital build a solid friendship as a foundation for your relationship.
If you both have some hobbies in common, it gives you plenty of things to discuss.
You can even share tips and suggestions on how to make things better.
It also gives you both something good to talk about other than how frustrating it is that you're both apart and can't be with each other in person.
Surprise Each Other Surprising your partner with a gift or a thoughtful gesture is a great way of showing that you care.
It doesn't have to be anything fancy; it might just be as simple as a photo of you with some thoughts about how you feel about them.
You might go to the trouble of buying or even hand making something for them and sending it to them through the post.
Getting a parcel in the mail is always exciting, and it's especially touching when it contains a thoughtful gift.
If you can't make something, then ordering something online from places like Amazon.
com or a florist close to where your partner lives can work just as well.
Get Raunchy Occasionally Imagination is one of the biggest turn-ons for a lot of people, so why not use it to your advantage and dream up little fantasies to share with your partner while your online? While it can be a bit embarrassing to start with, all you need to do is imagine what you'd like to be doing with your partner and just describe that to them.
You don't even need to be overly graphic with you're descriptions; leaving them some blanks to fill in with their own imaginations can often be an even bigger turn on for them.
If you're embarrassed, it might be easier to start with a text-only format like email or instant messaging, but once you get more adventurous, you can try it while talking online or while using webcams.
Don't Make It All About Sex While online sex can be a lot of fun, you need to be careful that your relationship doesn't revolve around it.
If it's all you're after, then there's a good chance that things are going to peter out pretty quickly.
Netsex isn't as good as the real thing and can be incredibly frustrating if you don't have a physical outlet.
So, remember it's better to have a sense of moderation and try to balance your time with your partner talking about other things.
There's no need to avoid it completely, but like a normal face-to-face relationship, too much of an emphasis on sex can cause the relationship to quickly fall apart.
Be Realistic Long distance relationships can be very tough if you have unrealistic expectations about where things are going.
Talk about these things and realize that getting together in person is going to require a lot of sacrifice for one or both of you.
Weigh up if that's a price you're both willing to pay.
If you're serious about your relationship, then you'll find being open and honest will actually make the load easier to bear for both of you.
Make Plans To Get Together Definitely plan to get together in person as often as you can, even if you can't move to be with one another.
Plans like these give you both something to look forward to and can help ward off the frustration that long distance relationships often cause.
If you're in the same country, it's often easier to make these plans than it is if you and your partner live on opposite sides of the planet.
The ultimate aim of any long distance relationship should be moving together somewhere, so try to factor that into any plans that you're making.
It's a good idea to spend a few weeks on a couple of separate occasions to make sure you're compatible before taking the plunge and moving closer together permanently.
Don't Give Up Your Own Life Just because you're in an online relationship with someone doesn't mean that you need to spend every waking moment glued to your computer.
You still have a life of your own to live and you need to spend time away from the net.
If nothing else, it will give you things to talk about when you are spending time with your partner.
Sweating off on when they're going to come online or whether or not they've send you an email or an instant message will drive you insane.
If you keep things in perspective, it's much easier to have a fulfilling life and still be able to spend quality time with your partner, without becoming obsessive and stalkerish about it.