- 1). Talk to your fiance, first and foremost, about what you expect out of your party. You may not agree on all of the details at first, but most people prefer foreknowledge to unhappy surprises.
- 2). Agree on boundaries and be prepared to negotiate. You may decide mutually to keep your respective evenings private or you may agree on a simple compromise--for example, that strip clubs are OK but lap dances are not. Respect those boundaries or speak out first if something makes you uncomfortable. It isn't fair to punish someone later for something that you agreed to.
- 3). Make a list together of those things that are most important to you both: committment, forgiveness, trust. Family and marital counselors agree that couples need these tools and reminders to plan for a successful future together.
- 4). Choose a party play or venue that fits your desires and expectations individually and as a couple. For a bachelorette party, this might mean a fun night of dancing at a nonthreatening gay bar. For bachelors, it could be a trip to a fancy club or a night being the king of the party at a favorite sports bar. Whatever fits your level of comfort normally as a couple should be taken into account.
- 5). Send a flirty text or leave a sweet voice mail before the night is over. Your future spouse will be grateful when she discovers that she was on your mind despite the party shenanigans.
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