A few women have been observed in the labor­atory to orgasm multiple times or with minimal stim­u­la­tion.
But such women are incred­ibly rare.
Many of these cases have more in common with a nervous disorder or some kind of fit than a sexual release.
If someone exper­i­ences orgasm like the ticking of a clock (or hiccups) it not likely that another un-afflicted person could duplicate that exper­i­ence even if they wanted to.
Our sense of inad­equacy comes from expect­a­tions set by unique indi­viduals.
Yet the very sensa­tion­alism of such stories high­lights the rarity of women's true orgasmic response.
Genital hiccups may have char­ac­ter­istics in common with orgasm but they are not a response to erotic stimuli.
It is assumed that women in the past did not orgasm because of ignor­ance (of effective stim­u­la­tion tech­niques) or atti­tudes (that inhib­ited their responses).
But a true sex drive cannot be subdued just by social pressure.
If a man cannot achieve an erec­tion he feels truly wretched (so that life feels hardly worth living) because he cannot enjoy his arousal cycle.
Women may be unhappy about a lack of orgasm but they can live with it.
Women have sex because they feel guilty about not offering in the past, they are trying to keep their partner happy or because they want to enjoy an intimate act with a lover.
These are perfectly valid reasons for a woman to engage in inter­course with someone she loves but they do not indicate any kind of 'drive' to have sex or an orgasm.
Waiting for a lover to initiate inter­course indic­ates a wish to be found sexu­ally desir­able, a need to feel appre­ci­ated and a desire to enjoy sensual and loving intimacy.
Sex drive cannot be switched on and off depending on a man's personal circum­stances (such as whether he is in a real­tion­ship).
Men can compensate (e.
g.
by masturb­ating) but they can't easily subjugate their drive to a lover's wishes, which is why men can appear insens­itive as lovers.
It is implied that women are happy with a lack of orgasm.
Most women are too embar­rassed to ques­tion but also they don't want to hurt their lover's feel­ings.
Women may reluct­antly accept that inter­course is not arousing.
Men cannot compre­hend that without a sex drive women have no reason to be moved by sex at all.
Rather than try to convince men of some­thing they will never accept women take the easier route of faking.