From the time we are children, the traditions of our culture have a tendency to separate us from the innate knowledge and wisdom that comes to us quite naturally! One of the best and primary examples of this is when parents discourage their children from touching or connecting with their own genitals.
Remember and notice how little ones, in attempting to soothe themselves, will reach for and hold their genitals.
Try it now and just relax into the feelings that happen quite naturally.
Just close your eyes, breathe deeply and slowly and relax into the feelings that slowly and gently reveal themselves to you.
Sometimes, it might be a sexual feeling, but mostly, it just feels good.
For me, it is as if I am connecting with a part of myself that feels from the inside out.
It feels familiar, soothing and there is an inner connection that happens that invokes an inner sense of peace and quiet.
It is as if I am holding all of myself and it feels grounding and safe.
It brings me back into a sense of my body - getting me out of the chaos of my head and the ever nagging thoughts that often bedevil my mind.
Surprising, isn't it? As children, when hands are slapped away from this important and natural medium for self-soothing, we are re-directed to look to others for our sensual pleasure and good feelings.
This is the genesis of co-dependency in our culture.
As adults, this teaching is so powerful, that even when biology and instinct over-ride such ideas, their undercurrent, never totally sublimated, interferes on varying levels with our ability to fully give ourselves over to and completely enjoy our own, personal sexuality.
When and if we choose to develop this part of ourselves, most opt for the quick fix - a furtive, masturbatory quickie, reminiscent of our childhood fear of getting caught - with a total focus of getting to orgasm as soon as possible, merely relieving some energetic tension.
Unfortunately, most of us don't realize that we are missing out on world-class personal nurturing, love, healing, and empowerment that will feed us on powerful levels that we cannot even imagine, until we allow ourselves to discover it.
In the practices of Tantra, we teach you techniques that will not only enhance the quality of pleasure and intimacy that you can experience with your lover, but also with yourself.
Sensuality and feelings of love come from within first.
The love you feel is the love that you ARE.
The more we develop this awareness and connection with ourselves, the more capacity we have to feel within ourselves more expanded states of pleasure - which gives us more awareness of what we have to share and can invoke within our lover.
In addition, we are better able to fill our own cup to the brim and overflowing -- No longer dependent upon others to feel good, to prop us up with good feelings about ourselves, to remind us of who we truly are.
So then, what we bring to our relationships is one who is full, not hungry.
One who is confident in his/her abilities with lots to share with another.
Now, like the tennis pro ready to play with another tennis pro, we can have a game that will take both to higher levels into a transcendent synergy of mutual up-leveling.
Seek and discover more ways to love yourself, in every moment, in every day.
Care for yourself as you would your most precious child or sacred archetype..
You are deserving of no less.
You actually owe it to yourself.
Love and care for yourself in each moment, following your passion -- especially in self-pleasuring (self-loving).
And watch how much more you have to bring to those you love! You are AWESOME!