Can A Book Help Save Your Marriage?

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For starters, a lot of people categorize book therapy into one of the marriage therapy options.
Married couples may give themselves the option to either attend traditional walk-in therapy, or they may consider purchasing a marriage counseling guide such as a book or ebook.
So why would married couples look towards the information in a book when they can sit right in front of a marriage therapist and get face-to-face counseling? Well, the cold hard truth is this: There are numerous studies that have shown that traditional marriage therapy is not effective at preventing divorce.
The staggering fact is, that about half of the couples who attend marriage therapy still divorce.
The most alarming part of this statistic, is that half of all marriages end up in divorce in general! With that being said, these studies have shown that couples are no more likely to stay married even if they are attending marriage counseling.
To look at it yet another way, only 8-10% of married couples who attend therapy can say that it has helped their marriage.
That is a very small percentage of people who can honestly say that marriage counseling has helped save their marriage.
So imagine that you have been referred to a surgeon for a procedure that has only a 50% survival rate, and if you survive, there is only a 10% chance that your condition will improve.
Would you elect to have the surgery? Probably not! However, considering the facts, most married couples choose to go with the marriage counseling procedure.
Why do married couples make this kind of decision? Because this is what society has deemed as a necessary procedure to save a dying marriage.
You see, marriage therapy can actually cause more damage to the existing struggling marriage.
Therapy may cause couples to actually replay the harmful experiences that has led them to therapy in the first place.
When a married couple in therapy begins telling one-sided stories, then it becomes a battle.
All the therapist may do, is just sit back and watch the interaction take place possibly jumping in to referee the fight.
The past is the past, and married couples don't need to remind themselves of what has put their marriage into trouble in the first place.
This is one of the biggest problems with marriage therapy.
Instead, they need tools that can help lead them down the healing path.
Marriage counseling books provide married couples with tools that can give them both a new understanding, and new strategies that can help save their marriage.
Our brains need new understandings in order for us to create new patterns.
Books can offer new models and understanding that can help to break us out of old patterns.
So books can be very powerful marriage saving tools.
A good book can help married couples gain new understandings of their marriage with good pieces of information.
However, there is a lot of information out there on the subject of marriage counseling.
Some of the information is quite valuable, and some is just plain useless.
A good book can help you to save your marriage in two ways.
First off, if your spouse won't agree to attend therapy, he or she may agree to reading a book which can seem like a less invasive option.
Second, even if your spouse won't read a book, you can take advantage of gaining new information that will help you to change the current perspective that you have of your marriage.
If you can change your perspective, then you will be changing old marriage destroying patterns.
If you change your patterns, then your spouse will be forced to respond differently, because you have made a change.
When, both of you are forced to change by building new patterns, then your marriage can change.
So when you purchase the right book to help save your marriage, remember this.
Read the book! Don't let it sit and collect dust, if you don't take the time to go through the material, you will get nowhere.
In fact, it has been estimated that about 95% of self-help books never get read in their entirety.
Also, don't just read it and think that things will magically take care of themselves.
Read it, absorb the new information, and put the knowledge that you gain into practice.
So if you, your spouse, or hopefully both of you can read it and put the new information to use, then yes, a book can help save your marriage.
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