Budgeting - Not the Most Romantic Conversation You"ll Have With Your Partner
The most romantic conversation that you will have with your spouse is certainly not the conversation when you discuss the family finances.
Not only are such conversations not romantic, they tend to be pretty grueling! A lot of couples try to avoid talking about their family finances like they avoid the Asian flu, however this is a huge mistake and can even be fatal! Did you know that one of the major causes of marriage strife and divorce revolves around the way the money in the house is handled (or not handled)? Just closing your eyes and wishing that things will work out won't help to solve the problem.
In this article I am going discuss a few ways to reduce the pain and anguish of when making a family budget.
1.
Don't blame your partner for everything.
No matter how much it seems to you that the other one is responsible for your family's financial mess, when you think about it, they are not SOLELY to blame; you also have at least a little to do with it.
For instance, if you feel that your partner has been spending money carelessly for a long time why didn't you speak up beforehand in a way that they can hear? People tend to perceive silence as acceptance.
Look deep into yourself to see if there are things on which you spend more money than your spouse feels is necessary? One of the benefits of admitting that you are also at least a little part of the problem is that the other party won't feel like they are being attacked, they won't become defensive and your discussion of family finances will be civil.
2.
Be future oriented.
However you got into the problem isn't what is important.
The major problem that you face is how to get out of your financial mess and stay out of it.
It is true that you can't ignore how the problem developed in order to take precautions that it won't repeat itself.
However your main focus has to be how to straighten your present sad state of your family finances.
3.
Respect your partner and let them speak.
Your purpose for holding this conversation is to straighten out your family finances and NOT to show off how smart you are.
Therefore let your partner give their take on the situation and don't jump on whatever they say.
In addition to this, the way people handle money is often times rooted in a persons upbringing and for them to change their habits could be very difficult emotionally.
Be sensitive to this and give them the time and space to work these feelings out.
True, ultimately conversations about family finances are tough and emotion loaded.
However, when you get your finances in line you will be able to enjoy many happy, romantic, and good times together.
Not only are such conversations not romantic, they tend to be pretty grueling! A lot of couples try to avoid talking about their family finances like they avoid the Asian flu, however this is a huge mistake and can even be fatal! Did you know that one of the major causes of marriage strife and divorce revolves around the way the money in the house is handled (or not handled)? Just closing your eyes and wishing that things will work out won't help to solve the problem.
In this article I am going discuss a few ways to reduce the pain and anguish of when making a family budget.
1.
Don't blame your partner for everything.
No matter how much it seems to you that the other one is responsible for your family's financial mess, when you think about it, they are not SOLELY to blame; you also have at least a little to do with it.
For instance, if you feel that your partner has been spending money carelessly for a long time why didn't you speak up beforehand in a way that they can hear? People tend to perceive silence as acceptance.
Look deep into yourself to see if there are things on which you spend more money than your spouse feels is necessary? One of the benefits of admitting that you are also at least a little part of the problem is that the other party won't feel like they are being attacked, they won't become defensive and your discussion of family finances will be civil.
2.
Be future oriented.
However you got into the problem isn't what is important.
The major problem that you face is how to get out of your financial mess and stay out of it.
It is true that you can't ignore how the problem developed in order to take precautions that it won't repeat itself.
However your main focus has to be how to straighten your present sad state of your family finances.
3.
Respect your partner and let them speak.
Your purpose for holding this conversation is to straighten out your family finances and NOT to show off how smart you are.
Therefore let your partner give their take on the situation and don't jump on whatever they say.
In addition to this, the way people handle money is often times rooted in a persons upbringing and for them to change their habits could be very difficult emotionally.
Be sensitive to this and give them the time and space to work these feelings out.
True, ultimately conversations about family finances are tough and emotion loaded.
However, when you get your finances in line you will be able to enjoy many happy, romantic, and good times together.